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Welcome
to the "Riding the Wave - The Wave Riders™ "
Newsletter. http://www.thewaveriders.com
Seeping
Silently into our Minds - Rejecting Indifference!
by Indigo Irwin Kennedy
Yesterday, my dog had an appointment
with the vet and I had an appointment with my eye doctor.
Both (male and female) doctors acted in a professional and
efficient manner yet I felt, after being at both appointments,
sad and slightly depressed. I do not like going to appointments
and if I have to wait an unreasonable time, I can sometimes
build up frustration and anger. I know better than to react
that way but before my brain can kick in this gut reaction
automatically shows up.
However, I was not angry nor
frustrated. The wait was reasonable and fast, yet I could
not shake this somewhat "let down" feeling. In both
cases the nurses were extremely friendly. I do not feel that
I need a lot from my practitioners but it appeared that something,
obviously, was missing. I considered the possibility that
I had "picked up" on something that they were feeling
and, because I was tired today, I had internalized it. This
internalization of other peoples' feelings is common among
empathic Wave Riders. I really wanted to move on from this
dragging feeling and so I took a few minutes to think of why
my mood had changed from a light and happy glow, to a dark
and gloomy sense of dread.
I realized that while these
two doctors were polite and efficient, they were also somewhat
rushed, short and robot-like. I soon realized what it was
that I had experienced - it was "indifference" and
it had seeped into my emotional body. It was not the first
time I had witnessed indifference, it was however, the first
time that I had noticed that it produced a subconscious affect
on my emotions.
Doctors and Vets are busy in
our area due to a recent boom in the population. Many people
moving here are simply without a family doctor relying solely
on emergency care at clinics and the hospital. I understand
the rushed visits and the doctor's desire to make sure that
they see everyone. I was aware of how busy they are and had
not expected a conversation, I had however, expected a somewhat
warm greeting that acknowledged that "a person",
"a normal", "everyday" person, had entered
the room.
We, the patients, in our chairs,
lined-up, rose up, and marched forward. We were viewed, documented
and then released. The only thing missing was a stamp on our
foreheads as we left the room. In the case of the eye doctor
there was even a sign stating that if you must remove your
coat, that you please remove your coat now and hang it up
in the lobby as to not "slow down" the appointment
(make your appointment more efficient was what it read). The
eye doctor spent most of his time behind the machine looking
into my eyes, yet I did not ever get the sense that he actually
looked into my eyes to greet the person that came to see him.
He became familiar with file #8960897 and spewed off the findings
as if it was the 100th time he had said this today (and I
think it was).
Doctors believe that in their
profession that they are to, "First, do no harm"
and yet, here I was feeling harmed, feeling damaged. Does
this type of damage not matter? The indifference created internal
harm, having neutralized the "good" that in his
profession he had promised to do. He is an eye doctor not
a family doctor or psychiatrist and so I did not expect analysis
or friendship. I simply anticipated an upturn motion of the
lips resulting in a small smile that said, "Welcome -
you are more than a file folder and number here."
The damage was not inflected
as a major crisis, an attack large enough for me to defend
myself and to stand up and declare that "I am worthy",
no, it was silent. It inflicted the injury in a subtle way,
managing to seep harmfully deep into my own self-worth belief
system.
The wound was a silently seeping
ooze of indifference that whispers to me… "you are
not worthy"… "you are not unique"…
"you are only a number that must be seen". True,
indifference just is something that is "out there"
and it was me that internalized this reaction from the experience,
however, I fear that we are being bombarded by this indifference
each day and that we may be allowing the wound to fester without
knowing it.
I wondered how many times a day we are subliminally (inadequate
to produce conscious awareness but able to evoke a response),
are fed messages that we are not worthy of recognition. How
many times a day do we absorb this indifference only to take
this invisible slap to the face home with us to share with
loved ones or to nurse the wound in solitude.
Indifference, described in Dictionary.com
as "apathy demonstrated by an absence of emotional
reactions" and that was it. That was exactly what
I had felt… "Apathy demonstrated by an absence of
emotional reactions".
What does this have to do with
Wave Riding?
1. Wave Riders, that have read
the book, are trying to balance their emotions. Being aware
that external triggers are being fed to us each day will make
this process easier. How many times a day are you affected
by indifference? Take the time to determine where in your
life you are picking up the signals of indifference and then
internalizing it. Indifference is "out there" and
cannot hurt us emotionally. It is only when we bring it inside
ourselves and believe the "sense of unworthiness"
that the damage occurs. We do need to be aware so that we
do not quietly hold onto the damage.
2. Make sure you are cleaning out any "old" externally
triggered beliefs about your self-worth that may have accumulated
over the years. Remember, if the belief does not empower you...get
rid of it.
3. If you are in the healing/helping professions or dealing
with the public in any way, please watch yourself for displays
of indifference. Take a few extra seconds to look your client/
customer/patient/friend in the eye and greet them sincerely
and fully so that they feel, valued. The good that you are
trying to do may be less important than the healing acknowledgment
that you give. Try not to "be doing good" while
wounding those that you come in contact with.
4. Take the time in our busy schedule to value each person
that comes into our lives, even if they are here for just
a few minutes of our day.
5. Give the young and the old our full attention and allow
them to speak their opinions fully. Too often they are given
silent messages that their opinions do not matter.
Our days grow more hectic, more
distant and filled with lineups and random "other people"
who we consider not to be part of our immediate family or
"clan". We suffer from the inability to keep up
with the demands of a rising population. Inside, filled with
frustrations and a growing sense of no control - we release
indifference and anger and we go home depressed.
We need to know that we can
make change in our lives and we do have some control over
our world. When we choose to treat others around us with acknowledgment
rather than indifference, we change the area around us and
our perception of the world in a positive manner.
If we alter the smallest area
that we are standing in first - it will spread - just a little
at a time. If we, around us, make sure that, we are not spreading
indifference nor shutting out the opinions of those that we
deal with - we can make change.
Take particular care with our
children, who are often put down and told that they cannot
have valuable input because they are simply too young. I hope
that you will take a minute to send a smile of worthiness
to a stranger.
Around the heart, past the mind
and into the soul.
Enjoy the journey
Indigo
Indigo Irwin Kennedy
Author: The Wave Riders
http://www.thewaveriders.com
Respond to this article by emailing
Indigo E-mail
info@thewaveriders.com
Click
here to order The Wave Riders Book (http://www.thewaveriders.com/order.html)
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